“What kinds of things do you like, Gregor?” asked his classmate.
“I’m a big bowler,” Gregor replied. “I would bowl every Friday back home. I got pretty good.”
After a few moments of silence, his classmate spoke. “I’ve never been bowling. I don’t think there’s an alley anywhere close. I do like hunting though. Have you ever been?”
Gregor scratched the back of his head. “I’ve never even held a gun before… I don’t know anyone that hunts where I’m from.”
The bell rang, releasing the class to go to lunch. His classmate left quickly.
It was Gregor’s first day at a new school. He moved from a big city to a tiny rural town. His first day was not going well. No one was mean, but he felt like an outcast.
In the cafeteria, Gregor got his Salisbury steak and mashed potatoes from a portly and kind lunch lady. It was better than the school lunches from back home.
He finished quickly and asked the lunch monitor to go to the bathroom.
When he got to the one closest to the cafeteria it was surprisingly full, so he made his way to the next one and entered. It was chilly, and the lights seemed dimmer.
Gregor shivered, but went into a stall and sat down. The toilet was terribly cold, but he stayed, finished his business, and flushed.
“You’re new,” said a voice.
Gregor buttoned his pants back and stepped out of the stall.
No one else was in the restroom.
“Hello?” he called.
No reply.
He peeked outside and didn’t see anyone in the hall either.
Odd. He returned to the bathroom, washed his hands, and scampered back to the cafeteria.
–
The rest of the school day was uneventful, as was the start of the next day. But when it came back to lunch time, the memory of the voice in the bathroom was itching at his brain. He scarfed down his food and went back.
He sat on the toilet and waited. Then, he realized he was crazy. Obviously, he didn’t hear anyone say anything.
Yet, as soon as he was about to get up– “Why’s he sitting on the toilet if he’s not going to use it?”
Gregor almost jumped out of his seat.
“Hello?” he called.
A few seconds passed.
“Hello?”
“Am I crazy?” replied Gregor.
“Wow. You CAN hear me! It’s been so long since someone with Second Sight sat here.”
“Who… who are you?”
“Oh, sorry,” the voice said. “I’m Hansel. What’s your name?”
“Gregor. So, are you a ghost?”
“Yes,” Hansel said. “I’ve been here a long time.”
“What happened to you? Why are you here?”
“Well,” Hansel said, “I died right where you’re sitting. I don’t know how. I remember a lot of pain, but then the pain went away. My vision got weird, then I saw my body slumped on the toilet.”
Gregor thought about it for a few seconds. “So you’re stuck in the toilet?”
Hansel laughed. “Yep, it’s a shitty situation. Pun intended.”
The school bell rang.
“I uh… I have to get to class.”
“Goodbye Gregor. Please come visit me again. It’s lonely here.”
Gregor got up and turned around. A pale, translucent hand waved at him from the bowl.
–
Hansel and Gregor became friends. Gregor would visit almost every day during lunch. Gregor felt uncomfortable at first given that he was being watched while he used the bathroom, but he eventually got over it as Hansel assured him he was used to it.
Gregor was having trouble making new friends at school, so he was thankful for Hansel. He could vent to him and joke around with him. Hansel shared stories from his life and Gregor would update him on new technologies and world politics.
“Really? That little box is an entire computer?” asked Hansel.
“Yeah,” replied Gregor. “And we aren’t supposed to use them in school, so that’s why boys come to the bathroom to use them. And it can probably do way more than what computers from when you were alive could.”
“Really? Like what?”
“Well for one thing, there’s a really good camera.” Gregor opened the camera app on his phone and smiled for the camera.
“Wow! Take one of me!”
Gregor got up and aimed the camera at Hansel’s hand, emerging from the toilet. It didn’t show up in the camera.
“Sorry. You’re not showing up in the picture for some reason.”
“So that’s true then, ghosts don’t show up in pictures. Well, now we know!”
–
One day, Hansel asked Gregor a strange question.
“So, Gregor… Can you give me a handshake?”
“Gregor raised an eyebrow. “You’re a ghost. Can we even touch?”
“Hmm… Well, it won’t hurt to try!”
“Um, okay. We can try, I guess.” Gregor stood and turned around. The same ghostly hand he’s seen a few times before stretched out of the toilet bowl.
Gregor took hold of it with his own. It felt like holding ice.
Hansel’s grip tightened.
“I’m sorry,” he said.
Gregor jerked forward. Hansel was trying to pull him in!
Gregor braced his feet on the base of the toilet and tried to pull back. How could a ghost have such a tight grip?
“Why?!” Gregor yelled as he resisted.
“One day you’ll graduate and no longer come to talk to me. Instead, you can stay with me. I need a friend, forever!”
He pushed off the base of the toilet with his legs, leaping at the stall door.
He slammed his head, but it worked. Hansel no longer held him.
Gregor looked up after coming back to his senses and saw a boy in a red shirt and overalls floating above the toilet, slowly rising.
“You… freed me,” Hansel said. “Thank you.”
Then, he faded away.
Gregor wasn’t sure what happened. Whether Hansel went to heaven, hell, or was roaming the earth. Either way, he made the decision to make living friends and never talk to ghosts again.